Archive for July, 2008

What Actors and Models Really Say…

Let me let you in a little secret… when actors and models get bored they said the darnedest things to keep the energy up.

I spent an hour yesterday sitting in a hot car with my Best Buy daughter Emma, dressed in a sweater, because it was supposed to be Fall. Never mind that it was 82 degrees outside. We were supposed to be looking at a map because we were lost. I was “confused” and she was “frustrated” because she was going to be late for a slumber party.

Remember, these are still shots, so we can say whatever we want, as long as the facial expressions are correct.

So, after arguing over the map for 30 minutes, I looked at Emma and said, “That’s it. You’re getting a timeout when we get home,” and then the banter went back and forth like this:

Emma: “I’m 12. I don’t get timeouts anymore.”

Me: “Fine, then I’m sending you to military school.”

Emma: “You have a lousy sense of direction. You couldn’t find military school if you tried!”

Me: “Try me missy!”

This went on for a few minutes, while the photographer had a laugh, took some pictures, and then said, “Okay. Can we get back to being cooperative again?”

There was a scene with Dad and me in the laundry room today, and it was supposed to be the morning after a cocktail party we had. We were folding laundry for 75 frames or so, having some nice banter, smiling, etc. Then I looked out the window and said, “Who’s that sleeping on the lawn?” to which he replied, “Your mother. The lush!” and it went on from there. The only person in the laundry room with us was the photographer, but all of production could hear us laughing on the other side of the door.

When we came out to look at the shots on the monitor, there were 100 or so normal frames, and then one last frame of me “loving” my new washer and dryer (see the comment from Nicola on my page). When something gets monotonous, you just have to get silly.

At the very end of the day I was leaning over the counter, face-down in the laundry, and that was the last shot. Just for fun of course. Not for the ads.

This is my Best Buy hubby David Williams.

I was wearing that hoody between scenes because it was cold. Not part of my wardrobe.

Tomorrow morning, call time 8am, cocktail party scene!

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Best Buy Day-2: Behind the Scenes

Yesterday was Day-1 of my fantastic adventure on the Best Buy photo shoot. This is far and away the coolest print ad shoot I’ve ever been on. The “set” is a beautiful house on some acreage not far from where I live. Production has rented the house from the occupants for the entire length of the shoot. They also shot the commercial portion there a few weeks back.

When production rents a house they basically have carte blanche to change things as long as they change them back. So far, they have put down temporary flooring in the laundry room, because they needed to change the look. They painted one of the bedrooms upstairs (it was lavender, it’s now yellow). They have changed out furniture, and re-hung art. The house is full of wardrobe racks, talent and crew. If I were the owner I’d want to be totally out of town. Don’t show me my house until you’ve put it back the way it was!

I love my stylist Casey Boyd (www.caseyboyd.net). The woman knows how to shop! I have an entire rack of great outfits and accessories for the week. Kudos to her assistant Faith as well, who has a way with safety pins.

These are my clothes for the week.


The makeup artist and hair stylist on the shoot is Nicola Corl, who actually used to be my hairdresser! She knows me and my hair very well, and she is one of the best in the business. She has done hair and makeup for photo shoots all over the world, and I am so lucky to have her helping me look great this week.

Here’s a view from the makeup area to the wardrobe racks.


The photographer is Andy Batt (http://www.andybatt.com/). We actually shot some funny stuff yesterday just for his own portfolio. He gave me a giant pair of scissors and a men’s baseball shirt, and did some angry housewife shots in the laundry room. My motivation: I just found lipstick on the collar of my husband’s shirt! Can’t wait to see those pictures!

We’re shooting against a white screen in a studio on Friday. I think it’s for those in-store cardboard cutouts. I just can’t even imagine walking into a Best Buy store and seeing myself as a cardboard cutout. How weird would that be!

More later… gotta get ready for Day-2.

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The Single Life in Portland, Been There Done That

I owe Ms. K a blog from my “Blogging for Dollars” fundraiser. She requested a blog on “Single Life in Portland.” Well if that ain’t a loaded topic!

Of course my mind immediately jumped to the topic of dating, not just being single in Portland. And I am an expert on dating in Portland, not something one usually announces in a public forum like this. But what’s a little girl talk between friends, eh?

Let’s get our terms straight first, shall we?

Single: only one in number; unique; pertaining to the unmarried state.

Bollocks! I am not “only one in number!” I have a load of close friends. “Unique,” absolutely. “Unmarried,” well duh!

Let’s get one thing straight: nowhere in the definition does it say “lonely.” Besides, I have three kids, heaps of friends, and Lili the Wonder Pug, not to mention an entire cabinet full of very good wine.

Dating: a person with whom one has such a social appointment or engagement.

If that’s the definition of dating then I’ve been doing it all my life! Is that really the definition of dating?

Dating: an engagement for an entertainer to perform.

Now that’s more like it! A first date is like an audition. I’m always wondering if I’m going to get a callback.

Online Dating: When I typed in “online dating” at Reference.com, I got the following:


They have no definition of “online dating,” but they sure know how to market it!

If you’ve been a blog reader for a while you know I have tried most every traditional online dating website, as well as some non traditional dating “sites” like Fry’s Home Electronics. One of my work colleagues who is new to the online dating scene recently asked me about my online dating experiences, and I found myself telling horror stories! Don’t we all? But, in reality, I have met some of the most interesting guys (and even one woman, who remains my friend today) on these online sites.

It’s a numbers game. And it takes patience.

(I do have recent horror stories about eHarmony though, and their new “relaxed matching” fiasco. That will be in a blog to follow.)

Portland is a fantastic city to be single in, to be dating in, to be married in. When people come to Portland they always ask me for recommendations of where to go and what to do. I have lived here almost 20 years, and I love to explore every nook and cranny of this city.

When I go out with friends, these are my top picks of places to go (I will add links later when I have time):

Friday Night: Start at Sinju in The Pearl and have some sake and a caterpillar roll. Walk to Bay 13 for a cocktail and some people watching on the loading dock outside. Walk a couple of blocks to Blue Hour for some Cougar sightings at the bar. Walk a block to Vault for a martini. Stumble next door to District and sit in the bay window where everything happens.

Fridays, Saturdays and Sundays: Spend an evening laughing your ass off (and maybe even getting up on stage) at Comedy Sportz on NW Kearney.

Last Sundays: Go to Mississippi Studios in North Portland and see The Liberators, the best improv comedy team around (IMHO). I think Mississippi Studios may be getting remodeled this summer, so check back in the Fall.

Tonight: Go see Live Wire when they have a show at the Aladdin Theater. Amazing.

Play pool at Uptown Billiards.

Wine and champagne tasting at Liner and Elson

Drinks and tapas at Matador or Cha Taqueria in NW.

See a band you’ve never seen before at the Doug Fir. Stay and have the mac and cheese at 1am.

Romantic date: Olea in the Pearl.

I could go on and on. These are just some things I’ve done in the past month. You don’t have to be single to enjoy Portland.

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2008 Relay for Life in Pictures

I want to thank all of you who donated to my Relay for Life cause this year and last. If you don’t know my story you can read it here:

I am a Survivor

I’m a little more than halfway to my goal of $1000. I raised $5000 last year. If you donate $10 or more I’ll write a blog for you, topic of your choice.

Blogging for Dollars

The theme this year was: There’s No Place Like Hope.

A young girl who belted out “Somewhere Over the Rainbow.

A field of dreams.

The track lined with “Luminaria” bags that had candles burning in them all night long. The wind was high so we had a few that actually blew over and burned up.

The good news: children who kicked cancer’s ass. The bad news: there were an equal number of bags for children who didn’t.

My favorite booth. They were dressed like pirates. I bought a button that says “cancer sucks.”

I am a survivor!


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Emotional Monogamy: is it Healthy?

A blog for Jim, who requested the topic of “Emotional Monogamy,” in my Blogging for Dollars (fundraising for Relay for Life) challenge.

When I was 10 years old my mom used to drive my sisters and I up to San Francisco to visit my grandparents. We often drove through the Haight & Ashbury area, and I would press my hands and nose against the car window with wide-eyed wonder and plead, “Please let me get out and walk with them! Please!”

It was 1972.

Then the ’80’s came and the hippies were replaced by Madonna wannabes.

I dressed the part: the torn shirts, wild hair, and dramatic eye makeup, but on the inside I was still thinking about those hippies on Haight & Ashbury. I identified with them and their free loving attitudes, and surmised I had been born 10 years too late.

1980-1984: I attended San Diego State University, the complete antithesis of Haight & Ashbury, and felt like a child looking through the plastic packaging at the land of Barbie and Ken.

When I graduated from college I moved back to the Bay Area and shared a house with three of my high school friends, and we created the closest thing to commune living as you can in the suburbs of sophisticated Saratoga, California. We not only shared a house, but we shared a common belief, that openly loving each other was the only way to live.

I have been married twice since that time in Saratoga, and both times I had no problem being sexually monogamous. However, I constantly struggled with the concept of emotional monogamy, that is, being restricted to only having a deep and meaningful emotional connection with one person at a time. It seemed so unnatural to me. But jealousy rears its ugly head when people are insecure.

I am an openly loving person, and my friendships run deep. I have intense emotional connections with my core group of friends, and I’m not about to give that up. I have an equal number of male and female friends, and each one of them satisfies something in my soul.

So, the real question for me is, is there someone out there who can meet all of my emotional needs? I doubt it. Problem is, that’s what we all expect from our partners. We expect that person to be our everything. It’s unrealistic.

We are a nation of posers if you ask me. Everyone’s trying to give the outward appearance of being monogamous, but statistics say that 80% of those claiming to be sexually and/or emotionally monogamous are actually sneaking around behind their partner’s backs. Why? Because monogamy is a choice not a natural predication.

It is hard to choose emotional monogamy with the Internet at your finger tips 24 hours a day. We exchange emails and text messages like handshakes. The line has been eternally blurred.

We all try so hard to fit into this pre-defined society we live in, and wonder why we fail. The world is changing my friend. Look around you. People are redefining relationships every day.

When I die I want my obituary to say, “She loved.”

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Relay for Life: I’m Blogging for Dollars!

I’m blogging for dollars. See below.

Some of you expressed interest in joining me for part of the Relay for Life. I will not be there the full 24 hours, because my kids and I will be sleeping at home this year. I made an executive decision NOT to haul camping gear down to the football field by myself this year.

I will definitely be there for the opening ceremonies and the Survivor Lap. My kids and I will also be making Luminaria bags to honor the people we know who are survivors, and the ones who didn’t make it. We will be there in the evening for sure, and bringing coffee and snacks to campers in the morning.

This is a Luminaria bag.

They are paper bags (decorated by anyone who is honoring someone) with sand in the bottom, and votive candle. You can use patterned hole punches to make designs to let the candle light through. They line the entire track with them and spell “Heal” or something in the bleachers with them. When they are all lit at night it is an incredible sight. I suggest you come late at night to see it and take a few laps around the track. The candles stay lit all night.

Bring cash! There will be people there trying to raise money by giving foot rubs, neck rubs, wheelchair rides (last year), selling candy, etc.

I would love to see you there. I will gladly give anyone who is interested my email address so we can connect there. Maybe we can do a MySpace Friends lap at a certain time.

If you can’t be there in person, please donate to the cause: http://main.acsevents.org/goto/kjhorton

If you make a donation of $10 or more I will write a blog for you on the subject of your choice! Just request your blog in the comments section of this blog. I will write the blogs in the order I receive the comments, posting one each day until I get to everyone. Give me a topic or just ask a question.

Lake Oswego High School
Saturday, July 12th

8:00am: Campsite set-up begins, teams will be assigned specific times to come.

9:30am: Survivor tent opens

9:45am: Campsites are complete

10:00am: Opening ceremonies

10:00am: Luminaria tent opens

10:15am: Survivor lap/caregiver lap

10:15am: Campsite judging

11:00am: Silent auction begins- Credit cards are accepted

12:00pm: Live auction begins

1:30-3:00pm Silent auction tables close

5:00pm: Lions Club BBQ Dinner for $5.00 (Cash Only)

9:45pm: Luminaria Ceremony Begins

11:00-12:00pm: Late night pizza and ice cream

Saturday, July 13th

7:00am: Bodyyoga Class

8:00am: Boot Camp with Shannon

9:30am: Closing Ceremony and Tribute Balloon Release

10:00am: Clean-up and Pack-up

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Billy Idol Concert: Middle Aged Topless Women, Not Attractive

Billy Idol was playing at the McMennamin’s Edgefield Amphitheater (more like grassy knoll) last night, and I was lucky enough to witness the spectacle with my friend Charlie.

This is my friend Charlie. I was doing my best Billy Idol lip and I have no idea what Charlie was going for with that face? WTF?


Charlie picked me up in Old Town where I work, and if I had been standing on that corner much longer someone would have tried to sell me drugs or ask me “How much?” Okay, Charlie actually arrived before I did, so that didn’t really happen, but it could have because that’s what Old Town Portland is like.

We drove out to Edgefield in beautiful Troutdale, Oregon in record time. Troutdale is known for three things:

1. It has outlet malls.

2. It’s the exit to take if you’re going to Mt. Hood (snowboarding!)

3. Jubitz Truck Stop, “Two bits at Jubitz will get you…” Oh never mind.

We turned into the venue and saw two signs: One for a wedding and one for a concert. I looked at Charlie and said, “A wedding on a Monday night? Is it the only night they could get?” Charlie jokingly replied, “Maybe Billy Idol is the wedding band!” Wouldn’t that be amazing. Turns out we weren’t that far off.

We parked in a big grassy field like the other hundreds of concert goers, and noticed something odd. I looked over at Charlie and said, “Oh my gosh. We’re here with a bunch of old farts. Look at these people.” Yeah well, those old farts are my age! People were carrying vinyl Idol in to get autographs!

Issue 1: Grass everywhere. I have grass allergies. I had taken a Zyrtec, but I was still sneezing.

Issue 2: We get up to the entrance and the guy checking bags looks at Charlie and says, “Is there food in that bag sir?” Hmmm, let me see. It’s an Elephant’s Deli bag. Brilliant detective! Yes, there’s food in it. “No food allowed in the venue sir, because we sell overpriced crap like hot dogs inside.” He didn’t really say that last part about the hot dogs but it was true. We took our food to a grassy hill just up the hill and had our dinner picnic outside the venue in peace. Much better idea anyway.

We finally went inside (a relative term since the concert was outdoors) and got in the shortest line at one of the bars, which was still 20 people deep. But those bartenders had their art down to a science. They were mixing drinks fast and we had our Herradura Silver margaritas in no time.

Now off to find a spot that hadn’t already been staked out by a group of drunken mullet-heads with vinyl albums in their hands. We found a spot on the slope behind a guy with his two daughters (probably eight or nine years old). I figured they’d be pretty fun to stand by, and I wanted to watch the dad explain the inevitable (Billy Idol cussing, bras onstage, topless partiers, etc.).

The view from our spot


The concert was supposed to start at 6:30, but Billy Idol didn’t actually come onstage until almost 7:30. He did not bound onstage. He did not run onstage. The guy practically needed a walker! Where’s the Billy Idol I remembered? Gasp. No more bleached blonde hair, but he does still have the trademark do. He looked, dare I say, tired

He stood in a 10-foot square area in the middle of the stage for the most part, and didn’t move much at all. He did finally find some energy during the second half of the show. I saw Billy Idol on a double bill with the B52’s in 1983, in the gym at University of New Hampshire on Halloween! That is the Billy Idol I remember.

Billy left the stage three times during the performance, sometimes for five minutes, sometimes for 10. Charlie and I came up with a list of things he could have been doing offstage:

  1. Taking a nap
  2. Changing his Depends
  3. Shooting up heroin
  4. Having a quickie with one of the many groupies

I can make these jokes because I am almost as old as Billy Idol! Turns out he was just changing his clothes each time (at least that’s what he wanted us to believe).

And now for the highlights

Acoustic White Wedding: Billy Idol and Steve Stevens did an semi-acoustic version of White Wedding, and it was awesome, Then they broke into the commercial version, and we finally started seeing some energy.

Steve Stevens: Steve Stevens has been with Billy for 28 years. He did a solo that had me mesmerized. That guy is by far one of the most talented guitarists I’ve ever seen. Purists might disagree, but I could watch that guy play for hours.

Billy Idol has Abs: Believe it or not the guy is still in great physical shape (on the outside anyway). He has great abs and he’s 52!


The Wedding Party: Yes, there really was a wedding going on that night, and the entire wedding party came through the concert crowd with their photographer at one point. However, they completely missed “White Wedding,” which Billy played very early in the set.

The Topless Women: There were two women MY AGE who were up on someone’s shoulders taking their shirts off and flashing the band. This was a bad idea on a number of fronts. First, not attractive. Second, YouTube. Hello? I am sure those women are up on YouTube right now, and their teenage son’s friends are checking them out along with the rest of the world. The really sad thing is that Billy Idol didn’t even notice! Ouch. Notice the young kid just to the right of the topless woman. I bet Daddy had some splainin’ to do in the car ride on the way home.

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The Sign: A guy in the front handed Billy Idol a sign that said, “PLEASE FUCK MY WIFE.” Excuse me? Not after the road rash that thing has seen.

The Signers: There were two sign language interpreters off to the side of the stage. They were the two most unlikely women to be signing a Billy Idol concert. I think they must have been from a local church. Having said that, they were more into the songs, and were more animated than Billy Idol was most of the time!


Hand Sanitizer: Billy Idol went to the edge of the stage and shook hands with a lot of fans during the evening, but there was one particular instance where he shook someone’s hand, then Steve Stevens whispered something in his ear. They both had a good chuckle and then walked over to a speaker stack where there was a bottle of hand sanitizer! No kidding. He actually poured a bunch on his hands and then wiped with a towel. I was dying to see who he shook hands with before he felt the need to sanitize. Wow. Must have been a really scary looking fan.

The concert ended with an encore that included “Hot in the City” and “Money Money,” which was a great way to end. I’m pretty sure Billy went back to his trailer and took a little nap before he walked over to the bar in the hotel and partied the night away.

Blog Reader Sarah was way closer than I was and has better pictures. You can see them here: Billy Idol Pics

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