Is all Really Fair in Love and War? A Match.com Story…

Originally published on MySpace on December 19, 2008.

Is all really fair in love and war?

I got an email from a good friend the other day. I’ll call him Mitch. The email started out on a very positive note. It started out with, Karma is shining her face on me I guess. The subject: Match.com.

But as always, there are interesting twists and turns when you are speaking of the online dating world.

Mitch’s email to me went on to say that he had just been thinking it was time to cancel his Match.com membership and give it all a rest for a while, because he just wasn’t meeting anyone worthwhile. Then he got an email from Cindy. She winked on a Monday morning, and they exchanged a few emails that day. It seemed she liked “nerdy, shy, intelligent types” (Mitch is), they enjoyed traveling to the same places, and even had the same favorite restaurant.

They arranged to meet for dinner on Wednesday. It all seemed too good to be true.

And it was…

He received an email from Cindy late Monday night, after they had traded emails all day and had planned to meet for dinner.

I would love to post the email verbatim here, but I don’t have permission from Mitch to do that. But here’s my version of it (grammatical errors and all!).

Mitch,

Hey, I’m sorry to have to break it to you, but don’t bother going to our
favorite restaurant on Wednesday – I won’t be there. In fact, I was really never planning to be there.

CONFESSION TIME: I put this profile up on Match and started emailing around to get my boyfriend jealous so that he’d get off his duff after 3 years and propose already, and it worked beautifully.

Sorry you got caught in the crossfires, but the emails had to look real. I guess your radar about my profile being to-good-to-be-true, was dead on. But hey, sometimes a gal’s gotta due what a gal’s gotta due.

If it makes you feel any better, you weren’t the only one I was emailing. Just one of the few I didn’t have to stand up. Happy Holidays!

Cindy <– Her real name because she deserves to be publicly flogged!

WTF Cindy? You used my good friend and a few other innocent bystanders to get your boyfriend to propose to you? And he actually walked right into your trap and proposed? Let me tell you something Cindy, people don’t like to be cornered and given ultimatums. Your boyfriend proposed to you under duress because he thought it was the only way he could keep you. Well guess what, if he’s not a dumbass he’ll wake up one day soon and kick you to the curb. Who wants to spend the rest of their life with a manipulative woman who acts like she’s still in high school? Or maybe you’re both dumbasses and you just saved my friend Mitch from a disaster. Good riddance.

The moral of the story? People misrepresent themselves online all the time to get what they want. And they don’t give a shit about you, because you’re just a fictitious persona they came across on Match.com.

P.S. My friend Mitch is not curled up in a fetal position because of this little incident. It’s just one of the many landmines of online dating. He was suspicious from the beginning.

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